Words Matter – What are your Filters?

Now we’ve looked at many of the non-verbal, it’s time to explore the verbal communication, more precisely how to answer some of the most commonly asked questions. This chapter is about the importance of words and using the right ones at the right time.

Part of my B2B sales journey led me to learn NLP, or Neuro-linguistic Programming – NLP, for me is a tool which can vastly improve your ability to communicate by understanding the layers of significance behind what others say and do. 

The reason I bring this up here is what we say and how we say it, tells a lot! Sometimes in a good way and sometimes not. Understanding the presuppositions behind your words, i.e. what you pre-suppose to be true in a sentence, can influence the power and meaning of what you say. Let me give you a couple of examples of how this works. 

Question: “How are you?”
Answer: “Not bad, you?” – 
Presupposition: Normally things are bad, but today is not one of those days
Interpretation: This person is a glass half empty type; they are focused on negative things and generally are less optimistic 

Question: “How would you describe your previous manager?”
Answer: “She is very strict and is constantly expecting everything to be perfect” – 
Presupposition: She is a consistently tough manager who is  
Interpretation: Is this person difficult to manage, is the manager consistently having to micromanage them? 


Finally, be honest – you have applied for the role because you